DISCLAIMER: The story, and characters and anything and everything else concerning SG: SG1 belong to MGM, Gekko, Secret Productions etc, they are so not mine and no money is being made from this and no copyright infringement is intended.
SEQUEL/SERIES: This story follows A Dream Can Come True, Believe, Wonderful, Like Someone In Love, I Scare Myself, This Girl's in Heaven, In Perfect Dreams and So Happy with You.
SOUNDTRACK: Lamb "Lullaby" from the album `Fear of Fours'.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author

Always and Forever
By Celievamp

My counterpart told me that she had never seen Janet look so scared.

I hated her for that, for scaring my love. I hated Harlan for body- knapping me, for duplicating my mind and my consciousness without my permission. For allowing my counterpart out into the world without knowing what she was – and who she wasn't.

The closed expression in her eyes when I got back scared me more than a room full of hostile Jaffa. My Janet had deliberately cut herself until she knew whether I was what and who I appeared to be or whether I was another duplicate. She did not want to be hurt again.

I tried to put every ounce of empathy of my love for her into my gaze as she took my blood, her shoulders easing a little as she saw red flow and not the white substance that had lubricated the android me. I remembered all the joy, all the perfect moments we had shared. But it would amount to nothing if I couldn't get her to look directly at me. Daring, I touched her cheek, her eyes reluctantly raising to mine. "Hey," I whispered.

A beat. A pause. She knew me. She smiled back. "He-ey." We were going to be fine.


I didn't realize that it wasn't her. Outwardly there was no sign that this was not the beautiful vibrant sexy woman I had kissed goodbye the previous day.

The mission had gone well though details were a bit scanty. They all seemed in good spirits, even the Colonel. It wasn't until we began the post-mission exam that it became apparent. These were not SG1. They weren't even human. I pressed the security alarm, my back to the wall as far away from them – as far away from the thing that was masquerading as my Sam – as I could manage.

I could not look at them. I could not look at her. This was not my Sam and I hadn't even noticed the difference. Inside I keened in fear and loss, hiding behind my doctor faηade, ordering tests and scans, trying to determine what we were dealing with and what threat assessment could be made of their presence among us.

The General and I confronted them with the nature of their reality. Then one by one they collapsed, apparently dying before our eyes. Instinctively I went to Sam, saw the mute horror at her mortality in her eyes. We did the only think we could do. We sent them back through the Gate.

And a few hours later they came back. Our people. My Sam. Once bitten, though. I held myself in check. She seemed to expect my reserve. Obviously she and her counterpart had found time to talk. I conducted most of the exam in silence, none of our usual bantering chit-chat. She reached out to touch my face.

"Hey,"

I looked up into her eyes. And I knew. This was her. My Sam. Unmistakable. She smiled. I smiled back. And all my fears dissolved.

"He-ey." We were going to be fine.


This is going to take some getting used to. I am not Samantha Carter. I mean I am Samantha Carter up until the moment that Harlin stuck her in that damn Xerox. But now I'm me. The same but different. Inorganic rather than organic. Android rather than human. Alone rather than with Janet.

The pro's – a long life, never getting ill, never getting old, all the technology I can shake a stick at. We have been made better.

The con's – being dependent on this place's cranky power source until I can fix something else up. Make it better as we have been made better. Being effectively exiled from Earth. Remembering everything that Sam Carter ever was and ever did. Being alone again. No Janet.

No Janet. That's the biggie. That's why I feel like opening up my chest and ripping out what passes for my heart.

My feelings for her – they're still so real, you see. It's just me that isn't.

The End

LULLABY – Lamb – Fear of fours
Always and forever
We'll be free
Always and forever
Be with me

We'll have love aplenty
We'll have joys outnumbered
We'll share perfect moments
You and me

Always and forever
You will see
Always and forever
Just be with me

We'll have love aplenty
We'll have joys outnumbered
We'll share perfect moments
You and me
You and me
You and me

Return to Stargate Fiction

Return to Main Page