DISCLAIMER: No ownership, simply fluff.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

A Welcome Home Celebration
By Ann


Edna Garrett talks on the phone as the former Mrs. Rick Bonner, Jo Polniaczek, and Blair Warner sit and listen from their position on the couch. ". . . Really? Well, that is a surprise . . . No! No, it's no trouble at all . . . okay then, we'll see you in about an hour. Bye."

A flustered Edna turns to the two women and says "Oh girls, we have to hurry. Tootie took an earlier flight from London, and Natalie is on her way to the airport to pick her up. We're going to have to put it in gear if we expect to get this place ready to welcome her back to the states. I'll put on the tablecloth and get the cake and punch ready. You two go up to my bedroom and blow up the balloons. The packages are on my dresser. Now, go on. We don't have a second to waste."

Jo and Blair start for the stairs as the phone rings a second time. As they get to the landing, they hear Edna chastising someone on the other end of the line. "Natalie, why didn't you call and let us know the minute Tootie called you? . . . oh . . . okay . . . Well, take your time getting back."

The two women shake their heads as they make their way to Edna's bedroom. Opening the door, Jo walks to the dresser while Blair takes a seat on the bed. Jo opens a package and throws several balloons to Blair saying "Here Princess, why don't you use some of that hot air you're so famous for?" Blair responds like the prim and proper adult that she is; she sticks out her tongue at Jo.

Of course, Jo returns the gesture, and the two fall back into their easy banter as Jo says "You know, Blair, you really shouldn't stick your tongue out at people. Someone may try to bite it off." Blair removes the balloon from her mouth and replies "I'd like to see them try." They both stare at each other for a few seconds before resuming their balloon inflating task.

Finishing the first package, both women decide to take a break before dying of lack of oxygen as Jo sits down next to Blair. Blair nervously traces the pattern on the bedspread as she says "I was sorry to hear about your divorce, Jo."

Jo shrugs her shoulders and replies "We shouldn't have gotten married in the first place. He was more in love with his music than he was with me. And I was more in love with . . . well, I just didn't love him."

An uncomfortable silence ensues before Jo finally asks "How's it going as Eastland's headmistress? Have you found a headmaster yet?"

Blair smiles and replies "Enrollment has doubled since we've gone co-ed. Of course, the antics the students pull have doubled as well. I'm just glad no one seems to be as creative as we were in our day." Both women share a laugh at the fond memories.

Jo rises to retrieve the second package as Blair adds "And no, I haven't found a headmaster. I think my expectations are just too high. No one can measure up to um, . . . my standards."

Returning to the bed, Jo hands Blair a few more balloons and replies "Don't worry, Princess. There's someone out there for you. You just have to be patient." Jo then reaches over, grabs an inflated balloon, and hits Blair upside the head.

Blair retaliates and the fight is on. Jo tries to dodge a head shot only to fall off the bed as Blair doubles over in laughter. As Jo starts to rise, something under the bed catches her eye. Stretching her arm out, she retrieves the small box and stands.

Blair wipes the tears from her eyes and asks "What's that?" Jo opens the box and pulls out a surgical glove. She looks at Blair and answers "I don't even want to know what these are doing under there."

Turning it over, she begins to blow air into the glove until it fully inflates. She holds it upside down and says "This looks just like the underside of a cow."

Laughing, Blair says "I've got a great idea. Let's blow all these up and string them from the banister. Then we can make a banner to put under it. We'll say something like 'You've been so udderly missed!' What do you say?"

Jo grins and replies "I think that's a great idea. Give me a hand." Blair grabs a couple of gloves and says "I'll give you two."

The women completely lose it and fall on the bed in laughter. Blair begins to tickle Jo and has the upper hand until Jo is finally able to flip them over.

The only sound in the room is their heavy breathing as Jo reaches up and lightly moves the hair from Blair's face. She hesitates a brief moment before leaning down to softly kiss Blair's lips.

Jo slowly pulls back to gage Blair's reaction, but Blair merely smiles and pulls Jo back down for a lengthier kiss. Tongues become involved and both women are breathing heavily for an entirely different reason when Edna's voice filters upstairs from below. "Hurry up, girls. We only have a half an hour before they get here."

Blair releases Jo's lips and whispers "We'll finish this later. Mrs. Garrett has us in the same room." Jo grins and lifts off the bed pulling Blair with her. She gives Blair a quick kiss before turning her attention back to the task at hand.

Together, they begin to gather up the balloons and inflated gloves to head back downstairs when Blair holds up one of the gloves and asks "What do you think Mrs. Garrett is going to say when we come down with these?"

Jo takes Blair's hand to lead her out the room as she says "I think she's going to be happy I didn't grab the box of condoms instead."

The End

Return to The Facts of Life Fiction

Return to Main Page