DISCLAIMER: The story, and characters and anything and everything else concerning Stargate are so not mine.
SPOILERS: set after the events of Season 8 "Moebius". A sort of companion piece/sequel to "Transit of Venus"
VISUALS: "Your Bruise". Soundtrack: "Perfect Girl" - Sarah McLachlan (from the Album `Afterglow')
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

The Rules
By Celievamp

 

She was falling asleep at her computer again, her mind drifting between ideas and memory, not really pursuing any one thought just. being. Her mp3 player shifted to a new song and she smiled. One of her favourite's. One of Janet's.

"But don't forgo know that you're loved no matter what

And everything will come around in time."

And then it happened.

It had been a while since she had felt it, that queer shiver down her spine, almost frightening, almost pleasurable. She sighed and closed her eyes as she felt the slight weight pressed up against her spine, the soft lips touch her hair, the pressure of the forearm around her body, hugging her, the five small pressure points on her upper arm that were finger tips.

"Hey," Janet said.

"Hey yourself," Sam said. She could feel the tears thickening her throat and swallowed them back. No time to waste in tears. She had no idea how long this would last. "It's been a while."

"I know. I'm sorry. Time." she felt rather than saw the shrug. "Time works differently where I am."

Greatly daring Sam reached up, wrapped her fingers around Janet's forearm, feeling the soft solid warmth of her flesh, the muscles flexing slightly as Janet's finger's moved against her cheek. As always she was careful not to look, not to try to catch a glimpse of her love. Those were the rules. Those had always been the rules. She was no Orpheus, but still.

"Why do there always have to be rules?" she asked.

"You're the scientist you tell me?" Janet smiled, brushed her lips against Sam's hair. She could feel the puff of air against her scalp. "It's just the way things are."

"I just wish. I miss you so much. if only I could see you, just for a moment."

"Not allowed, baby. You know that. Please, be happy with what we have."

That thick choked feeling was back again. "Okay. but at least tell me what you're wearing?"

Janet laughed. "Sorry to disappoint, love, but my astral body seems to be set in soccermom mode."

"Let me guess, the powder blue V neck sweater," Sam smiled, picturing it exactly. It was still in a drawer at home, one of a number of Janet's possessions she had been unable to part with no matter what anyone said about closure.

"Very good," she felt Janet's cheek laid against her head for a moment. "So, how are things with you. You've been busy, I hear... Colonel Carter!"

The pride in Janet's voice made her glow. "This and that, you know how it is. We beat Anubis, finally, we think and the Replicators aren't a threat any more. Even the Goa'uld are becoming less of a problem."

"You've done well. but this time-travel thing, Sam."

"Hey, we didn't. well, yes we did but it all turned out okay. Most everything seems to have gone back the way it was. We got the ZPM of course and the Col. the General has fish in his pond which strangely enough he's not that happy about."

"I know what you hoped, Sam." Her fingers stilled.

Sam was silent for a long moment. "Was that wrong of me?" She knew that there would inevitably be small changes in the timeline from what they did, hopefully not enough to change the future completely, but just give things a nudge. Plant a live ZPM in an archaeological dig site. Put some fish in an otherwise lifeless pond. Make a Jaffa miss its target on P3X-666.

"No. not wrong. a little foolhardy perhaps. And you must not try it again. Promise me. No more time travel. No more dimension hopping. This is your time, your place, Sam, believe me. And you are going to do wonderful things, have an amazing life."

"But what's the point if you're not here with me?" Sam said. And now the tears did fall. She was so sick of being strong, of being the one with the ideas, the plan. Enough.

"Because one day we will be together again. And it will be wonderful, I promise. And then nothing will part us. But only if you stick to the path." Sam felt her pull away and clutched at Janet's arm, holding her in place.

"I love you. I'll always love you. Don't go, please."

"I know you love me. And I love you, so much. But I have to go now. Those are."

". the rules," Sam finished for her. "I've rewritten a few rules in my time, you know. Broken a hell of a lot more."

"I know. But not these. Promise me, Sam. Never these. You don't want to know the consequences. Trust me." Sam's fingers closed on air, she felt a warm jasmine scented breeze touch her cheek for a moment. "Trust me."

"Always have, always will," Sam said softly. "Don't stay away too long, love."

But she was gone.

 

SARAH McLACHLAN LYRICS

"Perfect Girl"

Am I faithful, am I strong, am I good enough to belong
In your reverie a perfect girl
Your vision of romance is cruel and all along I played the fool
All your expectations bury me

[Chorus]
Don't worry you will fine the answer if you let it go
Give yourself some time to falter
But don't forgo know that you're loved no matter what
And everything will come around in time

I own my insecurities I try to own my destiny
That I can make or break it if I choose
But you take my words and twist them 'round
Til I'm the one who brings you down
Me me feel like I'm the one to blame for all of this...

[Chorus]
Don't worry you will fine the answer if you let it go
Give yourself some time to falter
But don't forgo know that you're loved no matter what
And everything will come around in time

You need everybody with you on your side
Know that I am here for you but I hope in time
You'll find yourself alright alone
You'll find yourself with open arms
You'll find yourself you'll find yourself in time

The riot in my heart decides to keep me open and alive
I have to take myself away from you
'Cause I can't compete I can't deny there's nothing that I didn't try
How did I go wrong in loving you

[Chorus]
Don't worry you will fine the answer if you let it go
Give yourself some time to falter
But don't forgo know that you're loved no matter what
And everything will come around in time

The End

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