DISCLAIMER: Xena Warrior Princess is the property of Renaissance Pictures and MCA.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: The Xena Competition in question.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

Sign me up, Take 2
By Ann


Xena gently stroked the blonde head lying across her stomach. Gabrielle's breathing was slowly evening out, signaling sleep for the bard. Their marathon lovemaking session had zapped the fit Amazon queen.

"Gabrielle? You mentioned something about a blooper prize. What is that exactly?"

The bard sighed sleepily. "Um, let me think. I remember seeing something about 80 minutes of bloopers from that show about us."

Xena frowned. "What's a blooper?"

"Well, if memory serves, it's a part of the show where the people mess up their lines or sometimes the equipment malfunctions."

"So, whoever wins this prize will see us making fools of ourselves."

Gabrielle lifted her head and looked at her lover. "It's not us, Xena. It's the actors who made the mistakes."

"Yes, but they were playing us, so in the end, it looks like we're the idiots."

"I never thought of that. Hmm, perhaps I better be sure to write the winning entry so that we'll get the DVD."

Xena nodded in agreement, but something niggled at the back of her brain. Suddenly, she recalled Gabrielle's earlier words.

"Gods be damned. You said the overall winner would receive the blooper package. What if the graphics person is better than you?"

Gabrielle glared at her lover. "Better than me?"

Xena quickly backpedaled. "No, that's not what I meant. Everyone knows you're the best bard around, but what if the graphic catches the judge's eye? It could happen."

"Yeah, I guess it could." Gabrielle plopped her head back on her lover's stomach. "What are we going to do?"

"Well, remember that guy I work with who kind of looks like Joxer?"

Gabrielle nodded her head.

"He's really good with computers. Maybe I can talk him into doing a graphic or video for the competition."

"That's a wonderful idea, Xena. Then, we'll get all the prizes!"

Xena smiled. "Yeah, now we just have to come up with an idea for the graphic thing. Oh, I've got it. How about a video of all our best fighting scenes? We can pick the best shots and even throw in some angst along the way. Viewers love that sort of thing."

"Kind of like that movie, 300?"

"Yeah, just like that. It'll be great."

Gabrielle crinkled up her nose. "It's already been done, very well in fact."

Xena jumped from the bed, almost taking Gabrielle with her. "Okay, how about we focus on a ship gliding across the water? We can have some flashbacks and keep coming back to the ship, and . . ."

Xena stopped suddenly, noticing Gabrielle shaking her head. "What? What's wrong with that?"

"It's been done, too."

"Alright, alright." Xena began to pace. "How about Bacchae?"


"Angels?" Another shake.


Gabrielle continued to shake her head. "Done and done."

"Hades, what's left? These vidders have thought of everything."

"Maybe that's why there's only been one entry so far. They're all racking their brains, trying to come up with an original idea."

Xena walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. "Maybe we should concentrate on a movie poster instead."

Gabrielle rolled off the bed, moved towards the computer, and switched it on.

"C'mere for a second."

Xena stood and joined her lover just as Gabrielle clicked on Passion and Perfection and pulled up some graphics.

"Before you start to come up with ideas, I thought you might want to look at what's already been done."

"Wow, these are really good." Xena took control of the mouse, clicking on the different movie posters while Gabrielle climbed back into bed.

Hours later, Gabrielle awoke to find her lover still at the computer.

"Xena? Why don't you come back to bed?"

"I've got to come up with a winning idea, Gabrielle. We've got to win that video."

"Maybe if you sleep on it, you'll come up with something."

Xena glanced towards the bed and practically shot out of her chair, the computer completely forgotten. Gabrielle was lying on her back with the covers pushed to the side, leaving nothing to the warrior's already overactive imagination.

Grinning, Xena approached the bed. "Maybe I will."

Sliding next to her lover, Xena latched onto the familiar lips, an idea suddenly forming in her head. She'd have to remember to ask Gabrielle if there were any restrictions on the video promo, but for now, she planned to act out the scene in real time.

The End

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