DISCLAIMER: Murder in Suburbia and its characters are the property of ITV. No infringement intended.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
Miscommunication
By Ann
"Sorry I'm late, Scribbs," Ash offered quietly, stepping next to her partner and peering around the corner of the corridor.
Frowning, Scribbs whispered, "Sullivan said you wouldn't be in today; that you weren't feeling well." The blonde looked over the brunette's shoulder as now only two heads could be seen from the other hallway's perspective, giving the illusion that Ash was one member of a pair of Siamese twins.
"I wasn't, and I'm not," Ash explained briefly, expounding, "He informed me that our suspect had finally been sighted and that you were on the way to apprehend her."
There was still no movement from the flat at the end of the long corridor, and both women simultaneously retreated back around the corner, pressing their bodies flush against the wall in an attempt to maintain their clandestine surveillance.
"And you thought I wasn't capable of handling the situation alone?" Scribbs asked, her voice now a loud whisper as she was clearly upset with her partner.
Holding her finger over her lips to signal for the blonde to keep her voice down, Ash glanced around the corner once again to be certain that they hadn't been overheard, and returning her attention to the annoyed blonde, she replied, "No, I have every confidence in your abilities, Scribbs. It's just that, well, um . . ."
"Well what? Go on, Ash. Just spit it out. Tell me how inept you think I am," the blonde spat, leaning closer to the brunette in a poor attempt to intimidate the taller woman.
"Are you daft? I've never thought you to be inept. I just wanted to make sure you had backup in case the woman somehow got the upper hand. Remember the martial artist? The one who punched you after you slammed the cupboard door in her face? You never know what type of skills a suspect has until you've got them cornered. I just, ... I just, ... Oh, bloody hell, I just didn't want you to get hurt," Ash confessed, suddenly feeling very warm and wondering if it was because of her fever or because Scribbs was practically glued to her.
The wind quickly went out of the blonde's sails, and she smiled at her partner's words. However, one look at the brunette's ashen face as well as the sweat forming on the dark brow had Scribbs concerned for the DI's health.
"Um, thanks, Ash. You know, you don't look so good. Why don't you go back to your flat? I'll take Ms. Simmons into custody and come around later to check on you."
A wave of dizziness rolled over the brunette, but she stubbornly fought against it. She wasn't leaving her partner alone until help had arrived; however, with the vertigo she was feeling, she hoped they'd hurry it up.
"I'll just wait until the bobbies arrive, then I'll head home," Ash supplied, distributing her weight equally between the wall and her partner.
"Bobbies? You called for help? Damn it, Ash. For the millionth time, I don't need any help," Scribbs argued while stepping even closer to the brunette.
Confused, Ash stated, "But Sullivan said you'd already called for assistance. He definitely mentioned bobbies."
The DS mentally reviewed her conversation with the boss, and she began to chuckle, holding her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing aloud.
"What's so funny? I know I look like death warmed over, but is my illness that amusing to you?"
Shaking her head, Scribbs offered with a grin, "No. It's just that Sullivan misunderstood what I said. I never said anything about bobbies, Ash."
Tired, frustrated, and now, downright nauseous, the brunette muttered, "Well, what did you say?"
Grinning widely, the blonde looked over her shoulder and whispered, "Boobies. I said, boobies."
Unconsciously, Ash glanced down at herself and then at her partner's chest, not understanding the significance of the mammary glands. Although, she did notice that Scribbs had a very nice pair. Of course, she'd actually noticed it before; numerous times in fact.
"What do boobies have to do with anything?" Ash asked as she began to wonder if perhaps she was delirious and this was all a dream she was having while safely tucked in her bed.
"It's just a hunch, but I believe they may be the cause of death. And I'm equally sure that it was accidental," Scribbs explained, peering around the corner once more to be certain that the suspect hadn't left her flat.
The DI's head began to spin faster as she struggled to make heads or tails out of the blonde's theory, but she just kept coming up empty, having no idea how in the hell Ms. Simmons' boobies were responsible for Mr. Carter's death.
"Are you mad, Scribbs? I'm the one with the fever, but you're the one who's delirious," Ash finally replied just as the sound of a door being opened reached the pair.
A set of footsteps drew near, and Scribbs quickly stepped out, stopping the suspect's progress. The well-endowed woman started at the sudden appearance as she placed her hand over her heart, or rather, over her very large breast, saying, "Oh! You startled me."
Pulling out her warrant card, the blonde stated, "DS Scribbins, Ms. Simmons. This is my partner, DI Ashurst. We'd like to ask you a few questions, if we may?"
The guilty, young redhead burst into tears and blurted, "It was an accident, I swear. After we'd, ... well, you know. Um, you see, Tommy would always fall asleep with his head on my chest. He'd done it countless times in the past, but the other morning when I woke, he didn't. I tried to rouse him, but he wouldn't wake up. I panicked and fled the hotel. He's married, you know."
Ash stood against the wall, stunned. She'd truly believed that someone had smothered the poor man with a pillow. Glancing down at the redhead's chest, she surmised that she wasn't far from wrong.
A pair of bobbies rounded the corner as the young woman began to blubber, saying over and over again, "I'm sorry, Tommy. I'm so sorry."
Scribbs softly explained that everything would be okay, but she needed for the redhead to go to the station and make a statement. She promised that the death would be ruled accidental, and the bosomy woman nodded her head as she walked away with the two bobbies that Sullivan had evidently dispatched.
The DI could no longer stand on her own as she slid down the wall, glancing back and forth between the two bobbies and the two boobies.
"Ash!" Scribbs exclaimed, rushing to assist her partner. "We've got to get you to bed."
Smiling, the brunette pointed to the retreating threesome and said, "Look, Scribbs. Bobbies and boobies."
"Yes, Ash. I see. Now, let's get you off the floor," the blonde chuckled, reaching under the brunette's arms to lift her from the carpeted hallway.
The DS finally managed to get her partner settled into the front seat of her car, and she leaned over to fasten Ash's safety belt. The delirious woman grinned as she took the opportunity to peer down the blonde's shirt.
Standing, Scribbs looked at the brunette's goofy grin and asked, "What?"
Ash just shook her head and continued grinning. Sighing, the blonde walked around to the driver's side of the car. Pulling from the kerb, she headed for the brunette's flat.
Upon their arrival, Scribbs repeated her earlier actions in reverse order. Walking around the car, she opened the door and began to undo Ash's safety belt. The brunette had kept her grin plastered on her face during the entire drive, so the only thing different was the drooling.
"You've got boobies, too, Scribbs," Ash said seriously as the blonde assisted her from the car.
"I certainly hope so," the DS muttered, placing her partner's arm over her shoulder as she moved her own to Ash's waist.
"Yours are nicer than hers," the brunette continued to focus on the topic at hand.
Scribbs opened the door to the building and asked, "Than whose?"
"The boobie murderer," Ash supplied as she attempted to place one foot in front of the other.
"Ash, it was an accident. Ms. Simmons didn't murder anyone," the blonde answered, finally getting the DI into the building.
"Tell that to Mr. Carter. I bet he knows he's dead, but oh... what a way to go," Ash slurred, relying on Scribbs to keep her from falling to the floor.
Arriving at the brunette's door, Scribbs struggled to keep Ash upright while digging in her partner's pocket for the key. The DI just put her arms around the blonde and gladly allowed her access to wherever she needed to go.
"Scribbs?"
"Yes, Ash."
"You have nice boobies. Some people have small boobies, and some people have big boobies. But, your boobies are just right," Ash said dreamily as Scribbs somehow gained purchase on the flat key.
Placing the key in the door, the blonde muttered, "Great. I'm baby bear."
Opening the door, Scribbs pushed it closed with her foot and headed directly to the bedroom where she gently placed her partner on the bed. Exhaling, she bent down to remove the brunette's shoes.
The blonde found a blanket on a nearby chair and gently covered her partner, and reaching up, Scribbs pushing a few hairs off the fevered brow. Standing, she turned to leave the room; she needed to report in and inform Sullivan that she needed to stay with Ash for the remainder of the day.
A few minutes later, Scribbs returned to the bedroom to find her partner asleep. Walking over, she looked down at the flushed face and smiled. Ash would literally die if she knew everything she'd said in the past hour. Grinning, the blonde turned to leave, but a weak voice stopped her.
"Scribbs, don't leave. Lie down with me, please. For just a few minutes, okay?"
The DS looked down into glassy eyes pleading with her to stay. Sighing, the blonde pushed off her shoes and climbed into bed beside her partner. Ash immediately clung to Scribbs, placing her dark head on the blonde's chest.
Within minutes, the brunette was sleeping peacefully; her dreams filled with visions of a blonde-headed bobby who had boobies that were just the right size.
The End