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Four Times Probie Almost Died
By queen_of_coffee
1.
He hadn't meant to see them, really. But the team hadn't had a case in days, he'd had all his paperwork done that morning, and Tony wouldn't stop harassing him. So it seemed like a good idea to go down to the lab and keep Abby company. He probably should have noticed that Ziva wasn't at her desk, and hadn't been since lunch. He really should have heard the sounds coming from the depths of the lab as he stepped off the elevator. But who could blame him for staring when he finally realized what was going on? And when Ziva looked up from between Abby's thighs and saw him, there wasn't much he could do except get the hell out before she could kill him. In his haste to leave, he dropped the caf pow he'd brought for Abby. He really shouldn't have turned around for one last look, if he hadn't slipped and cracked his head on the counter, Ziva probably would have killed him.
2.
It's the little things, really, that are the most dangerous. Like not knocking before going into an interrogation room. By now he knows better than to do that when Gibbs is in there with a suspect, but who would think to knock when the room is supposed to be empty? Really though, it's not that surprising; Abby has a thing for sex in public places and Ziva doesn't seem to mind indulging her. He can't blame Ziva for tackling him when he walked in; Mossad training and surprises don't go well together. But if walking in on them puts him in mortal danger again, he's going to have to have a talk with Abby. Or maybe he'll just start knocking.
3.
When Tony found out that Probie knew about Abby and Ziva before he did, he was a bit annoyed. But when he found out McGee had seen Abby and Ziva 'going at it' and hadn't immediately informed him, he was more than a little pissed. Tony didn't mean to shove him so hard he went over the rail at MTAC, and really didn't intend for him to crash into Gibbs. But when the coffee Gibbs had been carrying flew onto the Director's white blouse; the twin death glares were enough to send shivers down both agents' spines.
4.
He knows as soon as he opens his eyes that this is not going to be good. When you wake up on one of Ducky's tables, it's a pretty safe assumption that there is something bad going on. When you wake up on one of Ducky's tables and he is staring down at you, his expression a cross between concern and amusement, it'd probably be better to just go back to sleep and hope this is all some crazy dream. Which is exactly what Probie tries to do. Ducky stops him, goes into all the details of his concussion and why he has to stay awake. It finally occurs to Probie that he has no idea how he got a concussion. Ducky sees the expression on his face and gives him an explanation: "My dear boy, getting between Ziva and anyone that hurts Abby is never a wise decision."
The End