DISCLAIMER: Grey’s Anatomy and its characters are the property of ABC and Shonda Rhimes. No infringement intended.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Written for the Simply the Best Challenge, this pair are the latest canon couple on TV and so I thought they deserved to be celebrated. Companion piece to Five Kisses. Help, I think I'm addicted.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

Five Things I Wanted to Say
By Geekgrrl


What I wanted to say to Callie was yes. Yes, I am. Yes, Addison is right. Yes I am interested in you as more than a friend, in that gay Sapphic way, but I can see in your panicked eyes that you're not there with me. Or at least you're not there yet. Hey, a girl can hope right?

So I just laughed.

I laughed to cover the horrible ache inside and to give you an easy out. And then you laughed too, your smile lighting up your face and I knew we would be ok.

What I wanted to say to Addison was thank you. Actually I wanted to kill her at first for all the awkwardness she'd just put into my friendship with Callie. However after a little time to adjust, I knew I should say thank you.

Thank you for opening the door for me, for getting Callie to at least look at me and think about me as more, so much more, than her friend. Thank you for being on my side and seeing what our potential could be. It helps knowing it wasn't just me who could feel the chemistry there, or who thinks that we could be happy together. Instead we just watched Callie and Mark Sloan dance.

God, Callie is so beautiful, isn't she?

What I wanted to say to Sloan at the bar was get your big meaty paws off my girl, Pretty Boy. But of course I couldn't. She isn't really mine is she? At least, not in that way, not in the way I really want her to be. She's just my very good friend, and it's not like I have a whole lot of those, so I can't just go in and mess this all up over a crush.

Besides the way she's throwing herself all over him, how can I possibly blame him? I don't know if I can take much more, my little hopeful heart shattering when she led him out the door and into her bed. It's nothing another bottle of red at my place won't help me forget, for tonight at least.


What I wanted to say to Sloan in the elevator was don't count me out yet. Callie may be joking around about a threesome, fine I can play this game too. But have no illusions, you are not what this is about. I want Callie to think about this, about me, what we could have together. And then before I could talk myself out of it, I was kissing her.

I'll never forget how she closed her eyes and inhaled softly before I touched her soft mouth with my own. Cherry lip gloss and something all Callie are my new favourite flavour. I barely heard her low moan, it was almost a purr, so I knew I wasn't the only one affected by our kiss. My hand slid along her skin, cupping her cheek, afraid she'd pull away yet desperately wanting her to deepen the kiss. I wanted to show her how I really felt in this one brief moment but I knew it had to stop or I'd never get out of this unscathed.

Pulling back I looked at Sloan. I'm not giving up on her just yet buddy. Then the elevator doors opened and it was all too much for me, too raw for me to go back to joking around and I made my escape into the hospital hallways.

Who am I kidding? I'm already in too deep.

What I wanted to say to Callie was I'm sorry. I was distracted by my missing keys, off centre from the way the whole day had gone and to be honest it's hard to talk to you at the moment. I'm still trying to get my feelings under control around you. Then you said you were saying something here and my stomach dropped. I thought this can't be good, she looked so serious. She seemed nervous almost, but I didn't want to get my hopes up. And then she kissed me, really kissed me and my world changed forever.

There wasn't anything to say after that. We both knew this kiss would be the start of it all.

The End

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